I speaking mainly to pastors and church leaders, however, I assume many will identify with the stuff below.
2014 was, for the most part, the worst year of my life, save 1993.
I'm not sure I can describe the guilt, pain, confusion, frustration, and the amount of cursing that took place this past year. Oh my.
I know most of you have never cursed. Sorry.
Have you ever expericed brokenness in such an extended period of time that it felt as though that would become your new norm?
To say that I am out of the woods would be false. But at least I can see the edge of the woods.
What has changed?
A few things:
- I got honest with myself. And I'm still uncovering the mess.
- Counseling. Yes, counseling. I know I'm supposed to have faith and the Lord heal it all. I guess my faith is just weak. But counseling sure has rescued what my weak faith could not.
- Community. I surrounded myself with people who cared more about who I am than what I can do for them.
Pastor/leader... Please hear me: If you need it, go to counseling. Don't let brokenness be your new norm.
Find better community. If you are around unhealthy people then you have to cut them lose.
You matter. Your ministry matters. Your life matters. You owe your mental and interal health to yourself and to your family.
Don't quit. You will come out of this. Just keep looking for the edge of the woods.